Five Part Paragraph

     In these five part paragraphs, one issue in many has to do with embedding the quotations, or concrete detail. If not properly embedded, the concrete detail ruins the flow of the paper because it isn't tied in, or it just starts without any words to flow into it. Another significant problem in these paragraphs is the use of plot summary within the selected commentary. Commentary is supposed to reflect your own ideas and beliefs, and not a rehashment of what occurred in a certain part of the novel. In the commentary, it was important to tie in the book's theme to our own thoughts, yet many papers just stated what happened in that part of the novel, perhaps attempting at putting in their own ideas; but not quite making it. In my opinion, things that make a great paper are: great word choice, intriguing ideas, unique topics, and obviously correct formatting.
     In my paragraph, a major thing for me was using too many very long sentences that would have been better off with periods. To help fix this problem I feel that I need ro reread my paper out loud to get a feel for how it sounds, and fix the sentences accordingly. Another minor mistake I made in my paragraph was putting a "P" when I cited the page number. This is obviously an easy fix, I just need to memorize it for future papers. I enjoy the five part paragraph; it is easy to edit because it has a certain format, and for that reason they are also very easy to critique. For my next paragraph I will mainly focus on getting my sentences to flow better, and not sound monotonous or never ending.